The past few days I had enough physical and mental suffering. Especially because Alex isn't here with me I grew more and more negative about my condition. However, I managed to pick up myself again and I am ready to fight this.
I promised myself for these new daily routines:
Meditation for half to one hour every morning after wake up.
Be outside for at least one hour.
Try to switch coffee to tea.
Find one IMPORTANT thing to do.
Be positive.
I will try everything to work this in the right direction. I will avoid to talk or think about any details of my condition. I believe it's just very normal and it will be healed.
It is not always that terrible when bad things happen to you. I allow myself to be out and sat in my favorite coffee shop today for more than an hour. I felt great I did that. I was proud of myself that I have the courage to push myself. And suddenly I learned something really important. People take everything for granted when they are good and healthy. They make themselves suffer because of small little things, and forget about all the things that they can appreciate. I have to say that I used to be one of them. But I will not be like that anymore. It is so wonderful to be just a normal person. You can go out enjoy the sun, a coffee, watching people walk and talk, have a nice gathering with friends in a nice cosy restaurant. You think that these are all so normal and there is nothing to be excited? You know what, it can all be gone in a second. There is nothing more wonderful to be just a normal healthy person. And I will appreciate everything that I am able to do, and will be able to do again in the future.
I KNOW I CAN DO IT!